(I’m not sure how I feel about the “unravelling” part these days, tbh)
You see, I would quite like it all, that’s the overriding thing about me — I really would quite like to have it all, as all the ball-busting ceiling-smashing shoulder-padded business women of the 1980s promised me I could; I’d like to trip-trap-trip between glossy offices in my patent heels and pencil skirts, making deals and being very important. But then I’d also like to be a yoga-lean, raw-vegetable-nibbling, patchouli-scented earth mother type, wandering barefoot between my homegrown raspberry canes with my eyes on a higher purpose. I want both of those things. And all the selves in between.
It…
Mainly, I learned never to try to predict my own feelings
We’d been married for two years and we were away on a mini-break, which was a rare thing in those days because we had very little money. Also, we’d taken our children with us, because they were very small, so it wasn’t exactly a romantic mini-break. But still. We were on holiday. It was a treat.
The deal was this: we would meet some friends for lunch and have a day at the aquarium with the children, and then we would put the children to bed in the hotel and I would stay with them while my husband would go…
There is no way to tell an abusive man from his looks alone
Over the past couple of weeks, it has become fairly clear that the Armie Hammer abuse rumors — which include screenshots of his talk of cannibalism fantasies and details of him carving his initials into a woman’s genitalia with a knife — are going absolutely nowhere. (For more on those, see this fab piece by Carrie Wynn).
Hammer has already been dropped like a stone by both his agent and his publicist, and most of us are cynical enough to understand that when that happens to a previously highly bankable star, it’s usually a hand-washing exercise ahead of confirmed, or…
Can’t think clearly? That’s exactly what they want
When I was living alone for the summer in which I left my husband (after my messy, all-consuming, entirely regrettable affair), I remained in touch — at first — with my extramarital lover.
This is how that went.
On the night that our affair was discovered, he held my hands tightly and he said to me, looking into my eyes, “Listen to me. This is the horrendous bit. This bit is going to be awful. But we have to stay strong. We win, at the end of this. We WIN. We get each other.”
I sat in front of him…
I know, it’s a radical concept, but seriously — hear me out
Big news, here in England. Huge. After a grim locked-down winter, on Monday of this week, the UK government finally gave us a glimpse of what they will irritatingly insist on referring to as “a roadmap” back to real life.
From what I see on the news (ok, on Twitter), I understand that this is happening more or less everywhere now and that Biden is jumping around to sort out swift vaccinations and an exit plan in the US as well. Cogs are moving.
First of all, I know that it goes without saying that the winter really has been…
Your reviews glow because your work glows. And you're worth every reviewing word! Never be afraid to ask for that recognition!
It doesn’t sound an empowering choice, but I’ve learned that it is
Yesterday, the NHS in England announced a groundbreaking development. In London initially, 31,000 smear test kits are being sent out to women to use at home. This has been introduced mainly because the Covid-19 pandemic has had a catastrophic effect on routine appointments and there’s a hope this will help to ease the backlog — but also, it could signal the start of a general change in the way the ordeal of smear tests is generally perceived.
The UK is not the first country to offer at-home smear test kits. These are a commonplace offering already in lower- and middle-income…
Research says they can help you live your best, most youthful, and most productive life
It is no secret that diet plays a huge role in health. We all know we have to eat our greens, get our five servings a day, drink plenty of water and get enough fiber and vitamins if we are to be the best, healthiest versions of ourselves.
But can what we eat actually play a part in how fast we age?
Until recently, there was little in the way of concrete evidence to link people’s overall dietary habits with the elusive secret of remaining youthful as time marches on.
(Personally, I don’t have a Peter Pan complex. I am…
Instead of wild fireworks
Recently, I listened to a podcast interview with Ruby Wax, the outspoken comedian and TV presenter who is now an author and a vocal advocate for mental health. She was talking warmly about her relationship with her husband, the (according to her, anyway) longsuffering director Ed Bye.
The pair have been happily married for over 30 years and they met when Bye directed Wax in a comedy show. “I didn’t fancy him at all,” Wax declared. “I didn’t fancy him, so he didn’t scare me. I got to know him as a friend. …
I didn’t notice the moment it happened, but suddenly I couldn’t go back
The ending began, as these things so often do, with a beginning. That beginning was the start of my relationship with my first husband.
We were both young — so very, very young — when we met. Children, really. Not old enough legally to drink in bars; I wasn’t old enough at that point even to drive. But this boy liked me, and he made it clear that he liked me, and so because he liked me, I was smitten.
I really believe that my interest was piqued, right at the start, by the simple fact that he liked me…
Em Unravelling
Lover of words, books, hiking, nature and big skies. Running is my favourite thing (after the words & the books). As feisty as I need to be. theunravelling.net
